Look Up to the Mountains

Ah Monday, how I adore the way you love to creep up on me after a nice, relaxing weekend. But here we are, just you and me -- and my strong cup of coffee. As I'm back at home this week, scrambling to get things done before another much anticipated week of travel, I'm quickly being reminded of how fulfilling and renewing it is to just. be. still. Now, I'm an avid lover of adventure. I don't want to sit still, I want to see it all and do it all and meet everyone and do everything! Amidst all the excitement and fun that summer can bring, I find myself forgetting to be still sometimes. As I spend less time being soaked up with God's word and his spirit, taking time to pray and listen to what he has for me daily, I begin to spend more time fixating on the often overwhelming "loudness" that is life.

I just recently returned home from a family trip to Vail Colorado. For me, the trip was a desperately needed getaway from reality, because reality had me drowning. I was overwhelmed, life had been screaming at me, and it was time to silence it for a brief moment. So we went. And boy oh boy was my spirit transformed in the presence of some of God's most beautiful work in those mountains. I've traveled to the Rockies a thousand times, but never had I experienced them in this way before. For once in my life I really saw the beauty of it all and took in every last ounce of that crisp air, as if I'd never have another chance to breath it in. This time, the views had me in awe, in tears even, at how magnificent our God is. For seven days in that beautiful place, I was still. Of course, we were busy going out and hiking and shopping and laughing and enjoying ourselves, but my world was still and my God was present everywhere.

I started every morning on the back deck of my grandparents' home, a place I'd come almost every summer growing up. Every morning I would sit there and be in God's word, sometimes I would just pray, sometimes I would gaze out upon the mountains in complete silence for what felt like hours. (Almost) every night I went for a run as the sun went down in the valley. Mornings and nights were my favorite part of everyday because I felt the closest to God as he painted pictures for me in the sky. Before the trip I had been in a tug-of-war with God. I wanted something, but it seemed like he would keep taking things away. Or, I needed him to just tell me the plan, but all I kept hearing was nothing. In those moments, those mornings and those nights, he began revealing things to my stubborn heart. I finally could feel him just saying, "Ashley, you just need to be still, look around at what I've created. I've got this." And friends, the greatest truth I could ever speak to you is that, he does have this.

Over the course of a week I counted six rainbows. Six rainbows. Not just wimpy, faint appearances of a rainbow... Full on neon, you could see the pot of gold at both ends, rainbows. That was my promise from God, that even in the loudest and most overwhelming times of life, he is there, he is working, he is good. In those moments, when the air could not be more refreshing, the sunsets could not be full of anymore splendor, and the mountains could not be painted anymore beautifully, my heart was at peace and my soul fully renewed in the stillness and presence of the Lord.

 My point in sharing all of this is to say, take in those opportunities to see God in the quiet places and learn to just be still and simply listen. This world that we're a part of moves a million miles an hour. We spend more time obsessing over current issues and being consumed by the deafening screams of life than we do just shutting it all out for a moment to have peace. So go on an adventure, take a road trip, get on a plane, or walk out in your back yard, lie on the ground and look up at the sky -- Just. Be. Still. God has great big plans and he can do great big things, just look at what he's capable of and tell me he doesn't have huge intentions for your life. I needed some reminding of his promises, and he showed them to me in the most spectacular of ways. Take some time this week to slow down for a moment and enjoy his beautiful promises.

"I look up to the mountains, does my strength come from the mountains? No. My strength comes from God, who made Heaven and Earth, and the mountains." -For King & Country

{forever grateful, Ashley}

Dream Chaser

I want to be a dream chaser. Headstrong. Independent. Passionate. Adventurous. Dream Chaser. On the side, I'd like to try my hand at changing the world... And in no particular order, I want to graduate with honors from college. I want to go to Grad School and work hard to earn my degree. I want to learn new things. I want to be a missionary. I want to lead people in worship. I want the whole world to know Jesus. I want to mentor young girls to grow into strong women. I want to travel the world. I want to start a company. I want to help children talk. I want to jump out of a plane. I want to be a writer. I want to marry the man of my dreams. I want to be a Proverbs 31 woman. I want to have cute little babies. I want to own a home. I want to start a non-profit... The list goes on. With this burning fire in my heart I want not only to chase after my dreams, I want to make them real.

On the other side of my wild imagination is a wall I keep running into, the feeling of being "stuck." I'm sure you've heard people say, "the world is your oyster!" You can do anything and go anywhere, you have "the world at your finger tips!" I don't know the guy that came up with those phrases, but I sure wish I did because he seems like he has it all figured out. I don't particularly like oysters, and my fingertips are pretty small... and like I said, sometimes I just feel plain stuck. Do you ever just feel that way? This is sort of what I sound like in my head: "But there's these mistakes I've made, and this regret, and all this time I've wasted, and there's my broken heart, and that's just too big of a dream, I could never actually accomplish that, and no one will want me, no one will care, *gasp for breath* and I'm just not talented enough, I'm not outgoing enough, I just don't know how!!"
Don't even deny it, you sound that whiny in your head too.

And here's what's happening... We're allowing the shame of the past and the comfort of the present and the fear of the future completely tie us down and hold us back. 

Not too long ago I was watching the sun come up on a quiet morning and spending some quality time with God. In my devotional, (It's called She Reads Truth and it's totally awesome) I was reading the story of Lot's wife. You know, the one where Lot and his family are told to flee from Sodom and Gomorrah by two angels and never look back? But Lot's wife takes just one quick glance back at her home, the place she knows and is so comfortable with, just for one second... and she is turned into a pillar of salt. As I was reading I was reminded of how God has rescued me from some stuff. Some situations and some relationships that he never had intended me to stay in. He called me out, and he told me not to look back because the plan he has for my future is so much greater. But you know what I keep doing? I keep turning back in my mind, wishing and wondering how things would be different. Basically, He should have turned me into a pillar of salt a million times over by now. See, that's the thing about our dreams and about feeling stuck. God wants more than anything for us to chase after our dreams and to bring him the glory through it all. He doesn't want us to feel stuck in a rut as we tell ourselves that we're just one person and there's no way we could accomplish anything great. We insist on living in the past, reaching back for old mistakes and sins that he has already saved us from. We just float aimlessly in the present, literally stuck, not working towards anything because ultimately we're afraid of failure in the future. So how do I make any of those dreams up there a reality if I just let myself stay stuck? 

Here's the solution I've come up with so far... Time to stop reaching back into the past, it's over, it's gone. Start making plans, if you have a tug on your heart to go do something, pray about it and act on it, no more waiting around (for example: I have a passion for kids, mentorship, and volunteering. Last week I called my local Big Brothers Big Sisters non-profit and I start the process of becoming a Big Sis in a few weeks). Create a vision. I had a girls weekend with family not too long ago and we went out and bought canvas, got on Pinterest, and pulled out old magazines and made dream boards. That might sound cheesy to you, but especially if you're a creative person, visualizing your goals and aspirations is such a great way to get things going, plus it's so cute hanging up on my wall! 

I love the quote, "If you're dreams don't scare you, they aren't big enough." Have great big dreams, and chase after them whole heartedly. Don't even give the past one glance, it is only but a memory now. And yeah, the future is unknown and scary but you'll also never know the great things that the Lord has waiting for you if you don't start chasing after it. I can't wait to be sitting around with family and friends years from now, laughing and talking about all the things we've done, how the past shaped us and how chasing after our dreams changed us. 

"What God has saved you for is so much greater than what He's saved you from." -She Reads Truth

{forever grateful, Ashley}